Tuesday, August 26, 2008

guitar hero and rock band

So, I've been working out pretty much every other day, right? You'd have to go back and look where it was that I started, I think I mentioned it here and, frankly, I'm too lazy.

So, when you know, let me know. But it's got to be at least two months.

And I've seen a difference! And it's awesome, you know. I'm pleased with the results, I'm happy I'm doing something proactive about my health and all.

But, let me tell you about feats of strength.

I have been stuck on Rock Band's hard level... Stevie Ray Vaughn, goddammit... Pride and Joy is one hard song... on 'hard'.

I played it 14 times on Monday. I couldn't get it. I could not.

I get home tonight, after working out, and I see that I didn't save the game, so I have to do Tenacious D's "The Metal" again, which is tough in its own right.

Takes me three tries, but I do it. So, at least I can save it, thank god.

My arm is killing me. My hands hurt. This is just not going to happen.

First time, pffft.

Second time, psssshhhhh.

Third time, let me tell you, my heart was raci...

Wait a second.

Wait, wait, wait.


I think like 3 people read this blog. For those of you who don't know what Rock Band and Guitar Hero is... let's see if YouTube can school you... hmmm.

Picture me:


Singing! No sunglasses, of course...

OK, ok, sometimes with sunglasses.

With my buddies. Walter on the drums (he rocks) and Pete on guitar (he's awesome). Sometimes we switch. Walter will sing and I'll play bass... I can't play the drums for shit.

So, that's Rock Band.

Let's see if I can find a Guitar Hero clip that doesn't have a 12 year old Asian kid who's an idiot savant and will be in an institution in a couple of years, having gone insane from flashing lights and finger cramping...

Yeah, ok, I found that. And that's 'expert,' which, as you can probably surmise, is one level higher than 'hard' which won't be happening for me any time this side of Christmas, unless I practice ten hours a day, and get cataract surgery, when I need it.

All those discs at the bottom, those correspond with, I guess you'd call them frets, on the guitar you get with the game. And you have to strum a plastic doohicky (not the proper spelling) every time one of those things hits the discs, and hold down the appropriate...

Yeah, it's hard.

So, tonight I finally conquered Pride And Joy. And my arm and my hands both hate me. Which is not good.


That's the news.


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